Can't Sleep With the Man Who Dims My Shine: The Gaga Lyric that Inspired Me

I'm shiny and I know it! 

During my 2 months hiatus from the blog, I was faced with the question "What is your personal brand?" I wasn't sure at first how to answer this question. I am still working on it, but a Gaga lyric (of all things) helped me get closer. 

Think of the strong brands out there. Think of their slogans, what they stand for, their appeal and recognition. 

Just Do It - Nike

Because You're Worth It- L'Oreal

A Diamond is Forever- DeBeers

Companies spend an enormous amount of money on creating and building up awareness for their brands and attaching meanings them. Branding goes beyond slogans and into trademarks, images, symbols, etc. Whatever the method of branding, a strong brand elicits consumer trust and loyalty along with a positive perception. For example, Coke drinkers will not be caught dead with a Pepsi in their hands and vice versa. 

During a women's leadership conference, I was asked the question, "What is your brand? How strong is your brand?" 

I am only 25 years old and I am still developing my personal brand. A solid brand takes years to hone. I have devoted the past year to learning about myself, pushing myself out of my comfort zone and standing on my own. I have pushed myself physically by challenging myself to things like running a half marathon, racing up 40 flights of stairs and learning how to grapple on the ground. I have pushed myself emotionally by allowing myself to be vulnerable and letting others in even at the cost of getting my feelings hurt. 

Through it all, I have learned that I am independent, free thinking and that I have to strength to endure and overcome obstacles. I also learned that I do not want to settle for second best. There were times when I have been enveloped by the quick sand of being comfortable and started to settle for the status quo because it's easier than fighting my way of the sinking hole. I will surely step into this quick sand over and over again, but I now know I have the ability to recognize when I'm in one of those situations. I am confident I will always have the strength to dig and crawl my way out it, be it a bad relationship or a bad situation at work. I am confident I will build a brand that will be synonymous with everything I strive to be. A brand that stands for elegance in strength and genuineness. 

Self improvement is not done without difficulty. It is rough (and sometimes, I like it rough). Just do it. Because you're worth it. And when you achieve it, it lasts forever. 

Establish your brand. Discover your self worth. Discover your shine and refuse to have anything or anyone dim it. 

Re-Break My Heart, Say You Don't Love Me Again

Unlike Toni Braxton, this girl isn't afraid of being left out in the rain.

During a light discussion about dating over dinner with a friend last night, something profound dawned on me. As we talked about our fears of having our precious hearts shattered, I suddenly realized that I have arrived at that stage of life where I am comfortable and confident with myself enough that I am not afraid of having my heart broken. Of course I don't want to have my feelings hurt, but I know that I am strong and resilient enough to withstand the potential aftermath. I have come to the realization that I am ready to fall head over stilettos without a helmet or knee pads!

If love is a game, I want it to be rugby. I am ready to play hard, be thrilled and be fearless. Experiencing love and experiencing the lost of it is like a rite of passage. Why shy away from it? Why not embrace it full force? Sure, it could end up horribly, but isn't the chance of finding that grand love worth the risk? The grand love you may find could even be more love for yourself. I want to convince my dear friend that heart break is, after all, just another part of growing up and self-discovery. Don't be afraid of that pain, don't be afraid of being left in the rain. If you ever find yourself stuck in what seems to be a torrential downpour, remember to not just stand there...remember that around the corner, there could be a big awning or even a gorgeous stranger willing to share his or her umbrella with you. 

Smile-worthy Notes:

I got hit up with a holiday theme pickup line today, "Make my wish come true, all I want for Christmas is you!" 

The Cat Lady Cometh: A Reflection on Being Alone

Single life has become more comfortable to me, like an old, over-sized sweater with deep sentimental value. I don't even mind going out alone like I did initially. Coffee for one, breakfast for one (although I tend to order for two and never finish any of it. What I can say? I'm a breakfast kinda girl)...museum and Forest Park explorations completely solo. I am relaxing into this time of self reflection and it feels as amazing as slipping your tired body into a steamy bubble bath. I even catch myself smiling when I'm cruising around in the convertible. Nowhere to go. No one to see. Just simply living in the moment. Relishing the sweet and warm kisses from the sun on my cheeks. Taking in the sensation of gentle caresses from the crisp autumn breeze through my hair.

Suddenly, my blissful and lovey-dovey single life honeymoon suffered the harsh frigidness of realism. It felt like a cold bitch slap to the soul. And it stung like hell.

A dear friend joked about how I have the potential of becoming a cat lady in my old age if I keep up this single life. The comment was humorous at first, but it really got me thinking. Cat lady? Me? I can't picture myself as some old disheveled, jilted granny-hoarder with a festive feline following. I do not like clutter, I plan on being fashionable well into my old age and I am still not 100% comfortable with the thought of being in a home full of fur-balls. But really, what will happen to me when I wake up one day weary of being alone? I am more than grateful to have loving family and friends, but a part of me yearns for a significant other.

My motto is, "It's better to be by yourself, than miserable with someone else." I simply do not believe in settling. The friend who teased me about being a future cat lady also asked if I thought my standards were either too high or too unrealistic. After some honest gut checking, my answer is a positive and resounding, "No." I am realistic and practical. None of my "requirements" are outlandish. Of course, I know it's going to be difficult finding that one man who has the qualities I want on paper plus that X-factor that sweeps me off my feet. I am a woman with incredible balance. It's going to take a very special someone to make me fall head over heels. I like to think I love myself enough to know I deserve to have it all.

So, after I took a step back from heavy contemplation and slipped back into my figurative honeymoon and bubble bath, I have learned that I am not afraid of being a "cat lady." I have resolved that it is going to be all or nothing. No settling. No selling myself short. If that day I so dread comes along, that day when I wake up weary of being alone...well, I know exactly where to find an animal shelter.

Maybe I will one day meet my knight in shining Beamer. Maybe I won't...and I'm OK with that. (OK for now, that is. Let's reassess in 5 years when I am 30 and we'll see if this delicate, youthful optimism survives the tides of time and cynicism).




Side Note: Technically, a Beamer/Beemer is a motorcycle by BMW and a Bimmer is a car by BMW. In case I have offend any BMW enthusiasts out there, I do know the difference. I just decided to go with Beamer since not many people realize this difference. If rappers can play around with words for the sake of flow, so can I.